Premier League's 2025-26 Basement Dwellers: A Rogues' Gallery of Underachievement

May 26, 2026

The Premier League champions have been crowned, but the real entertainment lies in cataloguing those who've spectacularly underperformed. Here's the definitive ranking of the season's most notable underachievers.

Wolves: A Masterclass in Decline

Wolves have etched themselves into Premier League history—and not in the way they'd hoped. They're now the first club to endure ten-game winless runs at the start of consecutive seasons, yet somehow managed to hand out lengthy contracts to both Gary O'Neil and Vitor Pereira. Each has over two years remaining on their Molineux deals. Should Rob Edwards survive that long, he should treat it as a triumph.

Their trajectory tells the story: 7th, 7th, 13th, 10th, 13th, and 14th. What was once a respected establishment has mistaken tenure for permanence. The gradual dismantling of any player of note, replaced by cheap speculation on unproven talents, was always destined for one conclusion. The silver lining? Former chairman Jeff Shi declared relegation "a technical word" before departing, so apparently it doesn't count.

Scott Parker: The Hired Gun's Final Misfire

Eighty-six Premier League games. Thirteen wins. Twenty-one draws. Fifty-two defeats. Parker's record as a top-flight manager reads like a cautionary tale. More than twice as many goals conceded as scored across four separate stints with three different clubs. There's nothing dishonourable about being the manager who gets promoted then promptly sacked, but inviting him back to the Premier League would be asking for trouble.

West Ham: A Reckoning Overdue

The cruel irony is that West Ham's replacement options may well be Parker and Slaven Bilic—two figures determined enough to lash themselves to this sinking ship. It's precisely what the club deserves.

Two decades ago, chairman David Sullivan proclaimed: "I just think we feel like a big club. Not a tinpot club." Yet their subsequent conduct has broadcast a contradictory message entirely. He acknowledged relegation would be "very damaging" but insisted "we'd have to do whatever it takes to keep the club afloat. We always come straight back up."

The mathematics suggest otherwise. Last year's £104.2m loss and forecasts of a summer liquidity shortfall make a Leicester-style double-drop more probable than immediate promotion. The club has systematically squandered advantages that would make Brentford, Brighton, Sunderland, and Bournemouth weep with envy.

Sullivan's tenure has been defined by catastrophic misjudgement. The recent "declaration of war" against protesting supporters merely crystallises an organisation broken at every level. With the manager likely departing, assets destined for a fire sale, and the boardroom's credibility in tatters, West Ham's remaining identity will evaporate. Supporters may well gaze upon Lincoln with the same bewildered envy next season.

Spurs: The Yo-Yo Kings

Finishing 17th in consecutive seasons whilst somehow securing a European trophy in between represents a level of absurdity that requires no elaboration. The fact they've managed to improve their managerial situation despite this chaos only adds to the bewilderment.

Chelsea: Indemnity Through Incompetence

There's something profoundly troubling about a club that consistently makes terrible decisions, treats human beings like disposable commodities, and falls miles short of basic objectives—only to reward itself by appointing one of world football's finest tacticians. It's akin to punishing a misbehaving child with an expensive toy.

Under BlueCo, Chelsea remain insulated from consequences through financial firepower and historical prestige. Xabi Alonso represents a step forward in addressing their shoddy discipline and game management, but the structural rot persists. They're attempting to build on quicksand.

Newcastle: The Elite Burnley

"One of our targets this season was to be the first Newcastle team to have back-to-back Champions League campaigns," Dan Burn recently declared, apparently unaware that fate has other plans.

Under Eddie Howe, Newcastle have morphed into an elite yo-yo outfit, oscillating seamlessly between their finest season in decades and mundane mid-table mediocrity. Winning a trophy and securing Champions League football felt like a launchpad; it may prove to be the peak. Howe's accumulated goodwill at St James' Park has been almost entirely eroded. His summer faces scrutiny, particularly regarding which family members might oversee recruitment.

Arne Slot: Title Defence in Tatters

Liverpool shattered transfer records with £450m investment yet mounted a dreadful title defence. Slot's excuse? "Injury," he said—though not significantly more than other clubs experienced, and certainly not enough to justify such a dramatic collapse.

Perhaps Diogo Jota's absence proved immeasurable. Perhaps the new arrivals require another season to mature. Perhaps a decent right-back awaits. But Slot has exhausted his patience dividend and won't benefit from title-winning insurance if August brings unresolved issues.

Everton: Modest Progress Masquerading as Achievement

Angus Kinnear's "happily dissatisfied" soundbite will haunt the boardroom. Everton finished one place and one point higher than last season, yet registered more defeats, a worse goal difference, and zero cup competition breakthrough. Needing eight points from seven games to secure European qualification, they scraped together three. Watching newly-promoted Sunderland leapfrog them into the Europa League will test whether supporters genuinely embrace this "progress."

Nottingham Forest: Thrilling Highs, Abyssal Lows

European semi-finals. Victories over Liverpool, Spurs, Chelsea, and Sunderland. Morgan Gibbs-White retained. Yet interspersed with relegation-battling chaos and managerial upheaval. This wasn't the plan, nor any acceptable alternative. It's their second-best points tally since the mid-1990s, but it represents sideways movement at best.

Fulham: The Eternal Mid-Tabling Machine

Four seasons post-promotion, Fulham have oscillated between 10th and 13th with 47 to 54 points. Marco Silva has become the preeminent installer of top-flight glass ceilings. Only five clubs have maintained such a streak: Spurs, Middlesbrough, Stoke, Newcastle, and Crystal Palace.

European qualification was genuinely attainable, yet characteristic carelessly-dropped points—draws against Wolves and Nottingham Forest, the Brentford stalemate, the West Ham defeat—proved decisive. Silva's departure might prove disastrous; staying could mean stagnation.

Manchester City: The Monster Meets Its Maker

There's poetic irony in Guardiola stepping down partly because he lacks the energy to destroy his own creation. Manchester City controlled their destiny in May before bottling it spectacularly. His legacy is assured, but his apparent mortality is equally evident.